When he went to work this morning, he forgot his phone and asked you to help him out. He knew you would because you love helping him out. Unfortunately, the phone wasn’t all he forgot. He forgot about the empty bottles of rum, and he forgot that he never mentioned he prefers his Southern Sweet Tea over yours.
So, there you stand with a dirty glass in your hand, surrounded by dirty secrets. You’re only mostly shocked because you feared this for years. Now you have proof. What to do? Do you clean the mess? Confront? Cry? Yell? Ignore?
I don’t know what to tell you, because I can’t fix him and neither can you. The scene I painted isn’t hard for me to imagine; I’ve been in that house before. When I’m overwhelmed by the people pleasing, anxiety, and manipulation of my codependency, wise women in the rooms of recovery have taught me to pause and take care of me.
If I found that dirty glass today, I’d take it down stairs and wash it. I might still cry, but I would reach for my phone and text my sponsor. Then I’d fill the clean glass with something good for me.
I love smoothies, but I never used to take the time to make one for myself. This recipe is designed to be simple, quick, and easy. It has to be or the co dependent in crisis won’t even bother spending that much time, money and energy on herself. It only takes three ingredients and less than five minutes to make.
In a two cup food processor, add:
- 10-15 frozen strawberries
- 1 fresh banana sliced
- 8 ounces of orange juice
Pulse until smooth. Pour into your clean glass, and then make a list of things you can do to take care of you.
A Reach Out Recovery Exclusive By: Pam Carver