If you asked me to do something, I would quickly say, “Sure, I can do that for you. I’d be happy to,” even if I really wanted to say no. I didn’t know how to say no. I didn’t know that I had a choice.
I learned in recovery that “No” is a complete sentence.
I don’t need to give explanations or defend myself. I learned that I could say, “That won’t work for me.”
I also learned to say, “Let me think about that and I’ll get back to you with my answer.” That was where I started – just giving myself time to think it through and get in touch with how I really wanted to respond to the request.
Saying “yes” when I should say “no” cheats others from the lessons they are supposed to learn. It also can be a source of a budding resentment inside of me.
As a result of saying “yes” when I should say “no” I can get myself in a lot of trouble. I forget to take care of myself.
Sometimes, saying “That won’t work for me” is the most loving and kind answer I can give because it takes care of me and gives respect to others, knowing that they will grow as they figure out their own answers.
Content Originally Published By: Amy T. @ Blogspot.com