Setting Boundaries: Is This OK With Me

03 February 2017 Written by 

Listening to a short video clip by Brene Brown on Boundaries, Empathy and Compassion, I loved her definition of boundaries: “What’s okay and what’s not okay.”

If what is happening is not okay with me, then I am free to speak up and say so.

Learning to speak up is a big deal. It’s called “Finding my voice.” It took me over half of my life to find my voice. I was a people-pleasing junkie, losing myself in the process. I didn’t know what I wanted any more. I only wanted whatever would please you and make you happy.

I’m still not really proficient at saying what’s okay and what’s not okay for me. It’s something I am still working on. But I have learned to at least pause and think about my responses before I leap. I am learning to respect and love myself, and not feel guilty about taking care of my own needs - physically, emotionally, and spiritually.

It’s a good reminder that I need to consistently ask myself this question: “Is this okay with me?” If what is happening is not okay with me, it’s up to me to set a boundary.

Content Originally Published By: Amy T. @

Read 2268 times Last modified on Friday, 03 March 2017 20:01
Rate this item
(4 votes)
Amy T.

Raised on a dairy farm in upstate NY, I learned to work hard along with my five siblings. I grew up in a very conservative Mennonite-Amish church which shaped a lot of my fundamental core values and beliefs. After moving to Florida to attend college, I married and became mother to five children. Eventually, my unmanageable life came to a crashing halt and I found my way into an Al-Anon recovery program. Recovery has affected every area of my life and I love sharing the things I am learning with others so that they might also find hope for their own recovery.
Click Here For All Of Amy's Articles